Archer Coaching

Coaching you on your path to joyful abundance.

Archive for category definition

Creating Balance

Mar 27

Posted by Laura in Coaching, Mindfulness, Powerful questions, balance, blessing, choice, clarity, definition, joy, time | No Comments

(Originally published at FemCentral, which is a terrific site you should bookmark and return to often!)

Life balance has become a sort of holy grail in modern times. It’s hard to recognize it when we experience it, but we all know when we’re out of balance. Feeling overwhelmed, extra-stressed, drained, demoralized, and burned out are just some of the feelings that indicate a dramatic unbalance. So what is life balance, and how can we get some?

To start with, life balance is not time management. Life balance is not about fitting everything in, or saying “yes” to everything, or even allotting equal time to different parts of your life (work/family being an obvious example). It’s about knowing when to say “yes” and when to say “no.” This includes taking stock of the things that are important to you and making sure they are priorities in your life. Time and task management do not equal life balance, but they can be tools for helping you maintain it.

Whenever an opportunity comes up–a request to do something, volunteer opportunities, classes, work opportunities, anything at all–you have a choice of saying “yes” or “no.” Many people want to please or help others, like the feeling of being asked, want to feel accomplished or rewarded, or sometimes just feel obligated, so they almost automatically say “yes” to everything. It can be wonderful to experience growth and accomplishment from your commitments. But if you say “yes” to everything, you will very quickly find yourself overwhelmed, which can push you into crisis mode.

Some mindfulness and some intentionality when making commitments or accepting responsibilities offers a lot of clarity. Ask yourself the following questions when any kind of opportunity comes your way:

1. If I say “yes” to this, what else am I saying “yes” to? What am I saying “no” to?
2. If I say “no” to this, what am I saying “yes” to? What else am I saying “no” to?

It can be difficult to remember these yes/no options as things come up, so try asking yourself these questions about something that is already on your plate. You may find that there are more benefits than you thought to something you’ve agreed to; conversely, there may be higher costs associated with a task or responsibility. Don’t be afraid to let go of a responsibility or commitment that is no longer serving you.

I have found that when asking myself these yes/no questions before making a commitment, my values really start to show up. The things that are truly important to me make themselves known, and I can make a much more informed decision. It’s far more profound than just listing pros and cons. If I can see clearly what saying “yes” or “no” does for me on a personal level, then I can either accept joyfully or turn away from it with a sense of peace and wholeness.

Another key concept in life balance is prioritizing the things that are important to you. Steven Covey talks about this in his book First Things First: you don’t just prioritize the schedule, you schedule the priorities. Think about your life and the things that are important to you. If you want to be sure to be there in your roles as wife, mother, friend, healthy person, and spiritual seeker (to name a few of the many roles available to us), then you need to make sure your calendar reflects those commitments. If you believe that family is the most important thing, but your schedule is filled with extra work assignments, lots of networking, and business travel, you will feel the stress and disconnect of not sharing yourself with your family. A calendar review (weekly, monthly, however frequently you like) with your various roles and values in mind can really serve you in creating space in your life for all the things that are important. You can raise your awareness about your wants and needs and make sure that you have committed time to experience them in your life.

As you move forward with these techniques and some mindful intentionality in applying them in your life, you will experience several shifts. Shifts in your thinking will lead to new feelings, which create new actions and new results. You may find that your relationships grow and deepen when you make them a priority. You might stop feeling guilty when you say “no.” And you may end up with far more meaningful opportunities coming your way because you can wisely discern the ones that are right for you.

Tags: , , , , , , ,

The Education of a Coach

Mar 19

Posted by Laura in Coaching, Path, clarity, confidence, definition, education, performance, success, training | 1 Comment

I am thrilled to announce that I am now officially a graduate of an accredited coach training program! This is a big milestone in my coaching career, and it opens the doors for more learning and credentialing. I recognize that coach training is not well defined in the general public, so this blog post discusses training options and describes my own coach education.

Currently, coaching is not a regulated field the way social work, therapy, and counseling are (requiring training and degrees, certification, and even licensure). Anyone can call themselves a coach, and many do so, even if coaching isn’t quite the right term for what they do. There is no required training to be a coach. The International Coach Federation is a voluntary organization that has established core principles for training, as well as a code of ethics and credentialing levels for coaches.

For anyone interested in becoming a coach, go to the ICF Web site and look for Accredited Coach Training Programs (ACTPs). To be accredited by the ICF, a coach training program must have a minimum of 125 hours of coach-specific training on all the ICF Core Competencies and the ICF Code of Ethics, a minimum of six observed coaching sessions with an experienced coach, and a comprehensive final exam. A tip for clients seeking coaching: look for a coach who has completed some sort of training, preferably an ACTP.

My ACTP was offered through Erickson College, The Art and Science of Coaching. When I completed modules 1-4, I earned the title of Certified Professional Coach. I have just completed module 5, and I am now considered a graduate of an ACTP and have the title Erickson Certified Professional Coach. I also maintain professional membership in the ICF, which means (among other things) that I abide by their Code of Ethics.

Once a coach has completed an ACTP, he or she becomes eligible for credentialing through the ICF. There are currently three levels of credentials available to coaches: Associate Certified Coach (ACC), Professional Certified Coach (PCC), and Master Certified Coach (MCC).

For the ACC credential, the coach must graduate from the ACTP, have a minimum of 100 coaching hours and at least 8 clients, get letters of reference, and more. For PCC, the applicant must have graduated from an ACTP, have 750 coaching hours and at least 25 clients, and more. For MCC, the highest level, the coach has 2,500 coaching hours, at least 35 clients, and more. I will be applying for my ACC credential within the next six months.

There are also accredited continuing coach education units, which help coaches grow in their skills (and are required for higher levels of credentialing). I have taken a course in Coaching Team Thinking and Innovation (from Erickson) as well as Energy Leadership Training (from iPEC; more on that in a later blog post). An early commitment I made to my career was to have regular continuing education so that I can grow as a coach and serve my clients with more tools.

Questions about coach training? Leave a comment or email me!

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

>Coaching vs. Therapy

Apr 3

Posted by Laura in Coaching, definition | No Comments

>Yesterday, someone asked me what the difference was between coaching and therapy. A lot of people think that coaching is very similar to therapy or counseling, and it’s true that many counselors and therapists are adding coaching skills to support their clients. There is a primary difference, though, and here it is:

Coaching always looks forward, to the future, to getting what the client wants.
Therapy and counseling frequently look backward, to what went wrong in the past, to analysis.
In coaching, I believe my clients are whole, absolutely all right, and already has all the resources they need to succeed. My job is to help them unlock their genius. It’s not about “fixing” problems, or blaming and shaming, it’s about moving forward to meet goals. A client in crisis (say, any kind of mental health issues or some other trauma) may not benefit from coaching. I am the first to say that I cannot help someone in crisis, and I do refer them to other professionals, as appropriate.
Counseling and therapy tend to look more at what is not whole, what might be broken, or what is in crisis. This is important, and it’s complementary to coaching for some clients. Coaching is a powerful method for getting what you want, but it is no replacement for therapy or counseling when these are needed.

>Coaching vs. Therapy

Apr 3

Posted by Laura in Coaching, definition | No Comments

>Yesterday, someone asked me what the difference was between coaching and therapy. A lot of people think that coaching is very similar to therapy or counseling, and it’s true that many counselors and therapists are adding coaching skills to support their clients. There is a primary difference, though, and here it is:

Coaching always looks forward, to the future, to getting what the client wants.
Therapy and counseling frequently look backward, to what went wrong in the past, to analysis.
In coaching, I believe my clients are whole, absolutely all right, and already has all the resources they need to succeed. My job is to help them unlock their genius. It’s not about “fixing” problems, or blaming and shaming, it’s about moving forward to meet goals. A client in crisis (say, any kind of mental health issues or some other trauma) may not benefit from coaching. I am the first to say that I cannot help someone in crisis, and I do refer them to other professionals, as appropriate.
Counseling and therapy tend to look more at what is not whole, what might be broken, or what is in crisis. This is important, and it’s complementary to coaching for some clients. Coaching is a powerful method for getting what you want, but it is no replacement for therapy or counseling when these are needed.