Day 5: Are You Coachable?

One of the first things I learned in my coach training is to work with the willing. Not everyone wants or is ready for coaching. Those who want coaching might not be very coachable. The people who get the most out of coaching have a certain set of characteristics. If you’re interested in coaching, ask yourself the following questions to find out if you would truly benefit (coachable people will answer “yes” to most or all).

Do you have a compelling vision and a clear goal?

Do you know what you want? If you aren’t sure what you want, it is difficult (or impossible) to create it. There’s only so far you can go before you’ll get stuck. If you have a vague idea, spend some time crafting your vision of how you want things to be. When you have a clearer picture, you will be ready for coaching. If all you can think is “I just want it to be different than it is now!” or “I don’t want this!” then definitely spend some time imagining what “different” might look like and how you do want things to be! Coachable people have a specific, positive goal or vision in mind, from a short-term project to a big picture.

Are you future-oriented?

Coachable people are ready to move forward. They may learn from the past and take lessons from the present, but they do not allow themselves to wallow in the existing story. They aren’t so much trying to figure out why things went wrong or how they got here as they are trying to build a new future.

Are you open to change and growth–quite possibly beyond your comfort zone?

Coaching is about creating change. Getting what you want and crafting the life you envision requires change, sometimes quite a lot of it. Change leads to growth; growth leads to transformation. Change can be scary. You must be open to it to benefit from coaching. If you aren’t truly interested in change, then coaching isn’t for you.

Are you open to honest feedback?

Can you learn and grow from feedback? In the process of coaching, you’ll get honest feedback, sometimes from the coach, sometimes from other people, and often from yourself as you plunge the depths of your own knowledge and wisdom. Criticism stings (and we can be very hard on ourselves), but constructive feedback can shape your path in a positive way. Can you handle feedback, accept it, and move forward in wisdom?

Are you ready to work?

Coaching can open doors, create opportunities, and help you chart your path. No one can walk that path but you, and it requires taking action. The work may be spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, or all of these things. If you are passive and expect change to come to you, then you won’t get much out of coaching. If you expect that the mere fact that you are being coached will change everything, you will be disappointed. If you don’t put in the effort, you won’t see the reward. You should be ready for change, and you should be ready to make it happen.

Are you focused on something within your control?

A key to coaching is to be sure that you are focused on something within your control to do something about. You cannot change things like time, the laws of physics, and other people. People waste a lot of energy trying to change or influence things they can’t control (for instance, how someone else treats them). If you focus on yourself and your own thoughts, feelings, and actions, you will be able to make real change in a significant way. Through coaching and vision work, you can then imagine and notice how your individual changes might have ripple effects in those around you and the world at large.

Are you ready to invest time, energy, and money in coaching to get results?

Creating the future you want takes effort and work. It also takes time, thought, energy, and, yes, money. Coaching can be a valuable tool to help you get what you want, but it will only work if you feel your goals are worth the investment. Studies are showing that the return on investment for coaching (in business) is three to seven times the dollar amount spent. Instead of looking at coaching as an added cost burden or luxury expense (as many do), look at your goals and your life and ask this: “Am I worth it?” Coaching is an investment in yourself.

You may not be a good candidate for coaching if one or more of the following is true for you.

• You’re looking for a quick fix or easy answers
• You just want to complain or get validation for what you’re already doing (even if you’re taking no action at all)
• You tend to avoid taking responsibility (“It’s not my fault!”), pointing a finger of blame at other people and things
• You don’t really want to change
• You’re focused on things that aren’t within your control (other people’s behavior and actions)

If you’re willing to let go of these things, you might be ready for coaching.

Tomorrow: Laura’s Path to Coaching and Her Approach

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Day 4: How Do People Use Coaching?

People can seek coaching for support in nearly every aspect of their lives. A general “life coach” or “business coach” may help a client focus on many or all aspects life or business. In a sports metaphor, a head coach, someone who oversees all aspects of the game and team, is like a life coach.

Many coaches have a specialty, or niche, and focus on helping certain kinds of people (e.g., executives, entrepreneurs, speakers, direct sellers) or address certain aspects of life (e.g., relationships, life balance, communication). A specialist coach still connects to the whole client and doesn’t work totally in isolation on one particular area. In a sports metaphor again, a specialist coach might be someone who works with basketball players only on their free throws, or a putting coach for golfers.

Clients may come to coaches with the desire to create change in one or more of the following focus areas (and many others!):

• Career advancement
• Career change and job seeking
• Life balance
• Management and executive skills
• Starting or growing a business (including marketing)
• Time management/productivity
• ADD support
• Improve communication (including presentation and professional speaking)
• Organization
• Relationships (including parenting)
• Self-esteem and self-confidence
• Handling a specific issue
• Problem solving
• Financial planning
• Spiritual growth
• Health and wellness

I’ve you’re consider hiring a coach, but are not sure what to use a coach for, ask yourself these questions: What one aspect of my life could benefit from some coaching? What one area of my life, if I improved it, would improve all the other areas?

A lot of people think that coaching only comes into play for big-picture life or career issues. Did you know that coaching can also be supportive of a single particular project or a short-term goal?

Just about anything you can imagine that has a timeline for completion can benefit from some coaching attention!

• Writing a book
• Creating a business plan
• Developing a workshop or speech
• Training plan for a triathlon
• Losing a set amount of weight
• Starting a club or community group
• Planning a wedding or other large event
• Completing college or graduate school
• Job search
• Work projects, such as creation of an action team or development of a program
• Earning tenure at a university
• Increasing sales in a single quarter
• Marketing planning and implementation

Imagine what might be possible if you had focused support and energy around a single project. What could you achieve?

Tomorrow: Are You Coachable?

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Day 1: What Is Coaching?
A lot of people aren’t really sure what coaching is (and isn’t). Coaching is a relatively new (and still developing) field, and as such, a clear definition is sometimes elusive. Some seem to think that people come to a coach with their problems and then are told what to do, much as a mentor relationship works. Others tend to think of a coach as a sort of therapist.

For the clearest, simplest definition of coaching I’ve found, I quote the International Coach Federation: “Coaching is partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.”

Coaching is focused on working with clients to help them create what they want–a compelling vision, an action plan, commitment, and achievement! A coach honors the client as the expert in his or her own life and elicits creativity and resourcefulness, without offering a set path of “what to do.”

As a coach, I support my clients by listening, questioning, observing, eliciting solutions, and holding them accountable to action steps. I do not offer advice but help a client find her or her own path to sustainable change. I step into clients’ perspectives and help them move forward to achieve their goals and transform their lives, while also reminding them to look at the big picture, beyond the immediate effects of their choices and actions. I have a variety of tools and exercises that can help clients tap their potential and move forward toward achieving their dreams.

I am frequently asked about the difference between coaching and therapy or counseling. A lot of people think that coaching is very similar to therapy or counseling, and many counselors and therapists are adding coaching skills to support their clients. There is a primary difference, though, and here it is: Coaching always looks forward, to the future, to getting what the client wants. Therapy and counseling frequently look backward, to what went wrong in the past, to analysis.

As a coach, I believe my clients are whole, absolutely all right, and already have all the resources they need to succeed. My job is to help them unlock their genius. It’s not about “fixing” problems, or blaming and shaming, it’s about moving forward to create a powerful future. A client in crisis (say, with a serious mental health issue such as bipolar disorder) may not benefit from coaching if it is applied to the issue. I am the first to say that I cannot help someone in crisis, and I do refer them to other professionals, as appropriate. However, someone with a mental health issue may still benefit from coaching if it is applied to other areas of his or her life.

Counseling and therapy tend to look more at what is not whole, what might be broken, or what is in crisis (I admit these are very broad generalizations). Coaching is a powerful method for getting what you want, but it is no replacement for therapy or counseling when these are needed.

Tomorrow: What Does a Coach Do?

For more about coaching, see the ICF.

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In the course of my coaching training, reading, learning, and life experience, I’ve come across multiple ways to manage tasks and get more done. I don’t claim to use all of these techniques, but I do use quite a few of them. I thought I’d share them now and then on this blog. Today’s tip: maximizing your list(s) of tasks for success.

Lots of people make lists of tasks to get done. These can take many forms: online task trackers, lots of sticky notes, a notebook, scraps of paper, scribbles on calendars. If lists work for you and keep you organized, then by all means, keep using them! Consider some of the following techniques.

Mindset key: Lists (and calendars) are made so that you don’t have to remember everything. Write it down, and then the list does the remembering for you. This allows you to think more about how you want to accomplish the task (and other more forward-moving thoughts), rather than creating anxiety around trying to remember the daily nitty-gritty of what you are supposed to do.

1. Keep a daily short to-do list.

Research has shown that productive people who keep lists do it in a certain way. First, the daily list is relatively short: No more than 5-10 items that are the top priorities of the day (I personally try to keep mine to 5-6 items). This keeps the list manageable. Ever had that feeling of looking at your to-do list and thinking “I can’t do all of this, so I’m not going to do any of it!”? That can happen if your list is massively long. Keep your daily list short and doable. If anything does not get accomplished on that daily list, you can move it to the next day’s list.

• Slightly silly bonus tip: I love to start my list with something either super-simple or something I’ve already done, like “drink coffee” or “make list.” That way, I can cross it off right away. It seems silly (and folks often laugh when I tell them this!), but it gives me a sense of momentum and satisfaction! “There, one thing done, on to the rest!” (I happen to know I’m not the only one who does this.)

• Another bonus tip: Put a variety of “small” and “larger” items on the list. For instance you might have “Call doctor to schedule physical” and “Work on slide presentation” on the same list. One task will take a minute or two, the other might take an hour or more. Mix it up. If you have only one major task for the day (“clean the house”), consider breaking it down (dust living room, vacuum upstairs, dishes, laundry, tidy family room).

2. Make the to-do list the day before

The second key to maximizing your daily list is to make it at the end of the day before (or the end of the workday). A lot of people like to start their day with the list, but making it the day before you need it takes advantage of something very powerful: your subconscious brain. If you write the list, and then sleep on it, your subconscious works on the tasks for you while you sleep. Ever woken up in the morning and just knew the solution to a problem, or knew the correct decision in a difficult situation? It’s like that. You might be amazed at how much you can get done if you start making your list at the end of the day.

• Bonus tip: If you also keep a planner or calendar, consider combining your end-of-the-day list making time with a few minutes of calendar review. This will help you make reasonable lists for each day, because you’ll be aware of, say, how many appointments you might have coming up that take away from your productive time. You might also realized you have to buckle down for a few days because you have several days coming up that have little or no availability. Alternately, if you have loads of time for productive work, you might choose to schedule things that are important for future growth but don’t have a rigid, close deadline.

3. Keep master lists that are longer.

If you like to keep lists of “all the things” you have to do, that’s perfectly fine! Your daily list should be short and sweet, but you can refer to a master list—with categories and subcategories, if needed. Some people like to organize lists like “house items,” “business tasks,” “long-range planning,” and so on. However you like to have longer lists available, make use of them. Check with them now and then to see what you can cross off.

• Bonus tip: If you keep longer lists, then make sure some of them are keyed to your long-term goals and not just your immediate tasks. For instance, if you have a New Year’s resolution to learn more about personal finance and investing, your master list might include getting some books on personal finance, creating a budget, finding opportunities to save or earn more money, taking a class in investing, meeting with an investment advisor or financial planner, and so on. These may not be red-hot “do it NOW!” items, but they should appear on your lists at some point.

4. Digital or paper?

Some of us love the feel of paper and writing something down. Others are all digital, all the way. There are advantages to both, of course, so my advice is: if what you’re doing works, then stick with it! (I personally use both.) There are many ways to use paper lists–notebooks to sticky notes to special note paper designed just for lists! A benefit to paper lists is the sense of making it “real” as you write it down, and the satisfaction of crossing something off when you’ve done it. Digital options also abound: from Web-based, to software, to smartphone options, you can find something to suit your needs. A benefit to digital list making is that you can set alarms and deadlines to keep you on track and integrate them with your digital calendar, if you use one.

Mindset tip: Remember to celebrate what you get done! Too often we look at our lists and say “wow, I didn’t do X, Y, and Z” and forget what we did accomplish. Notice and celebrate what you do, and reward yourself if you like!

Resources

• David Allen has written two excellent bestseller books: Getting Things Done and Ready for Anything, about stress-free productivity.
• A good online to-do list with some fairly sophisticated features (free, or upgrade to paid account) is Toodledo (there’s an iPhone app for this as well).

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Announcing: A special coaching package to launch 2011 and catapult you into success!

• Four 1-hour coaching sessions at a discounted price
• Scheduled at your convenience (by phone or Skype)
• Includes powerful values elicitation exercise
• Begins with Life Plan overview for a big-picture view
• Focused on you and your life
• Certified, credentialed coach to support you
• Coach is available by phone or email for check-ins and updates

Cost: $300 (normally $450)

Get started: go to my Calendar page to see my Appointy calendar. Select the 2011 Package option, and schedule your first session! Or, contact me directly with questions or requests for other times. When you’ve registered, you will receive contact and billing information.

I look forward to supporting you in creating success!

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I have been self-employed for nearly 14 years, running a variety of businesses over that time. One thing I have noticed is that work seems to come in waves. Sometimes I’ll have tsunami of projects, other times just a trickle. I know I’m not alone in this. It can often be feast or famine. So what can you do to build your business if you don’t actually have billable work in hand? Plenty, it turns out! Over the years, I’ve learned to look at “downtime” as a gift to take advantage of. Check out the following ideas.

5. Learn something. Downtime, even just a few hours, is a terrific time to break out those CDs or MP3s you picked up at a conference or online but haven’t listened to yet, find some books and online training, or read that pile of magazines. It’s important to stay current in your field. You’ll have the time–so open up your mind, and get ready to learn some fabulous new techniques and ideas! Load up your e-reader or your iPod, or go to the library. If you don’t have a pile of stuff waiting for you, go online to professional associations related to your business.

Bonus tip: When reading, have a notebook handy. If you get inspired by an idea, you can write it down, with reference to where you read it. Then you have a “hot list” of ideas and thoughts that you can refer to without flipping through a pile of material trying to find it again. This can be quite useful when you’re searching for blog, article, or speech topics (see tip 7). Alternatively, keep some sticky-note flags available so you can highlight key ideas in a book or magazine.

6. Update your online presence. You may well have a daily or weekly practice of time set aside to maintaining your Facebook Fan page (or personal page), LinkedIn, Twitter, any Ning networks you are a member of, and your website, among others. Downtime is a great opportunity to make major updates and changes. LinkedIn particularly is constantly adding new features; take a little time to create a company profile, update your personal profile, find some new groups to join, and ask and answer questions. Write those new pages for your website like you have been thinking about, update your profiles on other sites, add more content where you can.

Bonus tips: With a tool like HootSuite, you can write a bunch of status updates and tweets and schedule them to go out in the future, instead of all at once. If you use WordPress for your website, you can “draft” pages before publishing them, giving you time to work them through carefully and thoughtfully.

7. Get writing. Write some blog posts, newsletters, articles, speeches, even books. When you make your expertise available, you establish yourself as an authority in your subject and offer valuable content to potential customers and clients. Downtime is a great opportunity to let your creative juices flow. Many blogging platforms allow you to schedule the release of your blog posts in advance (one colleague of mine has a year’s worth of weekly posts already scheduled!). You can easily turn blog posts into articles and publish those on your site (or at a site like ezinearticles.com) or submit them to relevant publications. If you have a regular newsletter, you can start prepping future issues to save you time. Finally, you can turn blog posts and articles into speaking presentations (if you have the communication skills), which is a terrific way to build your business. If you have several blog posts, articles, or presentations on a related topic, you have the bulk of a book (or ebook) written.

Bonus tip: Many social media platforms will link to your blog so that when you publish a new post, it is automatically imported to that platform.

8. Renew connections and make new ones. Business downtime is a great time reestablish your professional connections and make new ones. Have lunch, coffee, or meet up with your colleagues and strategic partners. Go through that pile of business cards and connect online (with social media) and in person. Follow up with potential opportunities by calling, sending a hand-written card, or connecting in another way. Find some networking groups to visit and meet new folks.

Bonus tip: Whenever you receive a new business card from a connection, write a note on the back–where and when you met, any key conversation tips you had, when to follow up, or whatever you need to remember the person by more than just a card!

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1. First, and most important: Take time off. Especially during holidays, it’s time for you to visit with family and friends, too! Recharge your batteries, enjoy your life, and take some time for yourself. This is important for staving off burnout. Remind yourself that one of the points of your own business is working (and thus, not working) when you choose. A little R&R can be just the mental and physical refresher you need to come back with renewed energy and vigor. It’s not a crime to spend a day goofing off, especially if you have the time in your schedule.

2. Clean and organize. Did your work space get cluttered up? Receipts lying everywhere? Left the filing until you “had a moment?” Now is your chance! Clean and organize your office space and come back to work with a fresh slate! Purge your email inbox, clean up your hard drive, catch up on the filing. Hang that artwork, vacuum, dust, take out the trash and recycling, create a supportive space for your work.
Bonus tip: Have you been considering implementing a new system for filing, accounting, a database, contacts, or other business process, or perhaps creating forms that might support your business? Devoting time to setting these up carefully and thoughtfully is a great use of downtime.

3. Paperwork. Get caught up or even ahead of yourself. Need to update files? Transfer handwritten notes to disk? Catch up on Quickbooks or online banking? Update log files? It’s never too late to get caught up or get a jump-start on the year-end paperwork you might need.
Especially important: Start inputting everything you need to generate some current financial information. Getting your paperwork up to date now saves you tons of time and frustration when taxes are due.
Bonus tip: If you get an accurate picture of your business finances, you’ll immediately see where you can make more money, where you can cut expenses, and more opportunities for growth. Don’t wait until the end of the year for this!

4. Set some goals. If you have updated your paperwork (especially finances), you probably have a good picture of what the last year, quarter, or month in your business looked like. Now is a good time to set more yearly, quarterly, and monthly goals for you and your business. Stretch a little! Write the new goals down, so you can track how well you do. Don’t wait until the end of the calendar year to set goals–do it now!

Next up: Four more tips!

What do you do for your business when you have downtime?

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I’m a planner! I’ve always been fairly good at tracking steadily toward a future goal or event. I rather like handling details one at a time until something is completed. It’s satisfying! I have online and paper calendars, lists, and reminders for all my tasks; all my friends know I am extremely prompt and often early when meeting them.

Ten years ago, I married my husband, a wonderful man who is very much the opposite when it comes to time. He lives in the moment. He doesn’t use a planner (except for work), rarely makes a list (unless for groceries), frequently runs a few minutes late, and doesn’t wear a watch. For a while, I thought this would be a real problem between us, but it turns out to be great. We make a great team, and he’s an excellent reminder for me to slow down and enjoy.

I recently had an absolutely wonderful reminder of how to enjoy a moment and treasure it. I am 18 weeks pregnant with our first child (a daughter), something I have longed for and tried to make happen for several years now. A few weeks ago I decided to hit one of the massive local consignment sales for kid and baby stuff. Pregnant moms get in a day early to get best pick! I had a short list of things I was willing to buy, if I found them in good condition and at a good price.

I showed up, got my wrist band, and started browsing. I was very quickly overwhelmed with the amount of stuff that was there. I did see pretty much everything on my list, but I was reluctant to grab it and buy it. I took a break and sat on a bench to think. That’s when I realized: I’m not ready for this phase yet.

I have so enjoyed just being pregnant and enjoying my dreams for what the future will be like! I’ve had a fairly easy time of it so far (no sickness at all), and aside from cleaning out the house to make room for the child, I haven’t had to do any prep work yet (I haven’t registered yet). I realized at that moment on the bench that I wasn’t ready to let go of that phase. I’m nearly halfway through–we just found out the baby’s sex and I’m starting to feel her move around in there. The rest of this pregnancy will go so fast, and we’ll have to make lists of what we need, shop, plan, work… and there is still time for that. There’s no need for me to rush into it yet.

So I went home without buying anything, with a big smile on my face. I can’t think of when I’ve been happier.

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Coaching is a collaborative relationship in which the client is supported in creating what he or she wants in the present and future. Certainly this is extremely helpful in terms of broad aspects of one’s life, such as finances, career, communication, spirituality, and more. Imagine what might be possible if you had this kind of focused support and energy around a project. What could you achieve?

You might wonder what kind of projects are appropriate for a coaching relationship. The answer: just about anything you can imagine that has a timeline for completion!

• writing a book
• creating a business plan
• developing a workshop or speech
• training plan for a triathlon
• starting a club or community group
• planning a wedding or other large event
• completing college or graduate school
• job search
• work projects, such as creation of an action team or development of a program
• earning tenure at a university

What are your pet projects? What would you like to accomplish, and by when?

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I’ll give a personal example. For a long time, I’ve held space in my heart and in my dreams for motherhood. In talking with my husband about having a child, he asked a great question: “How will we have a kid when we’re so busy as it is? How will we fit it in?” I realized then that something that large and life-changing doesn’t just get “penciled in” to our existing life. We must create space for it, giving up certain things and changing others so that we might be healthy, whole, and ready.

So I began paring down my responsibilities, specifically by deciding not to step up for officer roles in various professional organizations I belong to. I did some reading about fertility, learned how to chart, started taking prenatal vitamins, and tried to eat better and exercise more. I had some appointments with my doctors to deal with various issues I was concerned with. I put some money in a savings account to use during maternity leave.

I’m going through a similar process of making choices with my business right now. I am evaluating my commitments and side projects, winnowing some down so I can focus on my core interests and my best work. It’s a little bittersweet at times, saying goodbye to something that was fun but no longer moves me in the direction I want to go. But it opens new doors of opportunity, and that’s quite exciting to me!

I’ve blogged before about setting a goal and making sure it is SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and timed). Coaching is a way to help people set goals, figure out a plan, and track toward achieving it. Making space is a critical step that might get overlooked by some. We can’t keep cramming our lives full of stuff to do without occasionally weeding some things out and changing others.

What do you do to make space? What do you make space for?

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